Tom Brady says he won’t quit…football

“I wish I knew how to dump you!” This is Tom Brady talking to a football.

Remember when Ben Stiller announced that after the pandemic quarantined his estranged wife, Kristin Taylor, they fell back in love and called off their divorce? The opposite seems to have happened to Tom and Giselle. Brady just announced that after careful consideration, he is returning to what he loves most: being a quarterback.

“I’ve never quit in anything in my life,” Brady told his co-hosts on a recent episode of the Sirius XM show Let’s go! with Tom Brady, Larry Fitzgerald and Jim Graytrans People. This echoes statements he made at an earlier press conference Definitely not walking away from a brain-injuring sport that isn’t usually played by 40-year-olds, but still.

“I made a commitment to this team and I love this team and I love this organization,” he said on the show. This is in response to a question about potentially sitting out the entire NFL season because of him recent family problems. To be fair, Brady wasn’t even sure he’d get time off to attend the birth of his first child with ex Bridget Moynahan back in 2007, so it seems like The League is keeping these guys on a pretty short leash.

Tom Brady seems to vaguely remember that he did announce his retirement “in the past,” but continued, “I want to keep fighting as much as I can, and I’m always trying to do better. I always try to work hard and I always try to give more to what is important to me. And this team is very important to me, and of course I want to be the best for them.”

Which certainly sounds nice until you remember that his Victoria’s Secret model wife, Gisele Bundchendoesn’t want to be retired either and would like him to maybe come home and take care of their kids for a second so she can become a supermodel again. And if that doesn’t work, she can hire as many divorce lawyers as she needs she’s worth more than him anyway.